FNZ

Well Kids, unfortunately duty calls. Me and Briggety are leaving in a few hours. It's time to go over and liberate another country. We'll be deep in the shit, but I'm sure I'll find time to update adn send blogs from the front lines if they allow it. Otherwise, see ya in four months.

With one day to go until I go "over there" (in the shit), I was trying my hardest to not get in trouble, and just skate out of town. The boys called this morning and asked if I wanted to golf. Now in my mind there really isn't anything that could be safer. Hit the links, blow a few hours whackin balls around, come home, pack and take a snooze and then hit the road. Well it's hot out there so naturally we had to stop and load our bags up with some cold ones. So through nine, we're right on track. I'm playing pretty shitty, but I haven't lost a ball yet and I'm leading the threesome of me, charlie D (Frank Joooones!) and Big Country Kuns. We grab a couple dogs at the turn and head out for the back. Must've been somethin in those weenies, cuz we meedgitly stopped caring about the golf game and concentrated more on drinkin the beer that is starting to warm up in our bags. By 11 we aren't canned yet but we are well on our way. Me and Kid Country are practicing our Nascar evasive manuevers while Charles finishes up. 12 comes, another beer goes, no action. After 12 a little bit of magic happens. You may never see something like this happen again in your life. It's one of those things you just gotta see. I wish I was talkin about a hole in one or something cool like that, but of course I'm not. So Charles finishes up his hole and hops in with the Intimidator. I wish I would've taken a picture so I could set this up a little better, but of course I didn't take advantage of the camera phone. Anyway, I take off first up the cart path to 13 and Kuns is ahead of me and off to the side. He tries to punch it and mario kart slide and cut me off and take the lead not taking into account his surroundings. He does in fact take the lead, but it's shortly lived as he powerslides in front of me onto the path, off the path, and over the little rock bridge, into the drink. All I hear as I'm laughing hysterically is Charlie yelling Wiiiilllie in slow mo as they careen over the edge. So now we got a cart in the water, charles has a big ass Freddy Flintstone bump on his head from his run in with the bar on the cart, that makes him look like Warf, and all we care about is getting the fuck out of there. It takes us about 5 minutes to get the cart upright and out of the water. 3 drunks wading around in duckshit pondwater trying to get this thing out must've been a real treat for the group behind us. All they said was "thats why you don't drink and golf". I'm sure they dimed us out when they finished up, but we were long gone by then. We got it out, rolled back to the clubhouse incognito, dumped the clubs at the car and left the carts keys still in and rolled out. Definitely takes over as the funniest golf moment ever, although Frank running over Lanny with the cart is still a close second.